The
test of leadership lies in adversity. Does the test of Faith also lie in adversity or in those good times when every thing is going your way?
As
per the carefully laid out plan of the tour operator we were supposed to take
the train to Mina 1 station where our tents were based and where the tour
operator had dinner ready for us, get refreshed and then walk across the street
into Muzdalifah to spend the night as the rituals defined. Thus when we managed
to board the metro train at Arafat overcoming the stampede at the station gates
we thought we had made it. Little did we realize that the challenges had only
just begun!
The
train terminated at Muzdalifah 3 which was the station prior to Mina 1. It was
then we realized that, that night the trains would only halt at Muzdalifah to
prevent pilgrims from deporting at wrong stations accidently and missing the
key ritual of spending the night at Muzdalifah. Our destination was only about
2 Kms from where we had alighted but in that huge crowd of people it was
difficult to find the exact route. Two people assumed leadership of our group
of 10-12 pilgrims including a few old couples who had rigidly clung to us out
of the fear of getting lost in that mammoth crowd. And as it happens in the
proverbial ‘two horse race’, they began to pull us in different directions.
Ego
is probably the most difficult thing for an individual to overcome, even in a
sacred endeavor that is supposed to alienate you from worldly matters. And
compounded with fatigue, fear and a fastidious police which didn’t allow us to
gather at a place and think it through, decision making was on-the-go. For us,
the followers, the key decision was which leader to follow since each of them
had a different idea of the right route to take. Eventually we decided that the
most critical thing for us was to stay together rather than worry which leader
was right.
One
of the leaders managed to find the route to our camp. The other after a few
urgent phone calls realized he had taken the wrong route. The group was with
this other leader. We decided to spread our mats wherever decent space was
available and spend the night there.
It
is in such situations that one realizes the utility of technology. Though we
were separated we could still call up each other or the tour operator and
inquire about the safety. The problem was we ourselves were not sure where
exactly we were to give any direction. That night we also realized how testing
it would have been for our parents and grandparents when they performed their
Haj without the advantage of mobile connectivity and why the journey was
normally undertaken after you had finished all your worldly obligations.
One
of the rituals at Muzdalifah is to collect pebbles for the stoning of the devil
that has to be done for 3 days starting from 10th Zilhajja. The
ladies collected stones for us as the men went to fetch water and something to
eat. Most of the night though was spent in probe rather than prayers. It
emphasized that how a little bit of personal suffering or threat to security
was enough to divert us from the core purpose. Sacrifice, though easy to
understand and espouse, is so difficult to put into practice. It requires
fortitude and a true and complete belief in God – that He controls everything
and thus He will take care. Our task is to only put in well-intentioned
efforts.
Through
the night a few more of our touring group including one of the tour managers
reached our location and we took a decision to leave early at dawn in order to
reach our camp at Mina and avoid the rush when everyone would depart from
Muzdalifah to the far end of Mina for the next ritual of stoning the devil.
We
had failed to realize that forty million people were thinking on similar lines.
We
appointed key leaders who would hold the tour flags high to indicate direction,
tagged the older couples with younger ones and set off at dawn to reach our
camp where we were to take a break to rest and refresh before embarking on the
onward journey for stoning the devil.
As
we hit the streets wave after wave of pilgrims started to pour in since
everyone was moving in the same direction. Each turn became difficult to
navigate and distance between the flag bearers and the followers started to
grow as the aged failed to catch up in the huge rush. Everyone appeared similar,
dressed in the two sheets of white ihram
and the fear was that one missed turn would put us on the street leading to the
site of stoning the devil. That would mean another 4 KMs of walk in one
direction and in the current state of exhaustion that would have been
impossible for the elders and the womenfolk to undertake.
The
police there follow a simple rule of no-exception which is probably the only
way you can manage such a huge crowd and thus if you happen to get on to the
route leading to the devil you would not be allowed to turn back and take a
different route no matter what your situation was. Turning back would be a sure
case for a stampede. Military helicopters hovered on top monitoring the
situation.
Navigating
from one end of the street to another required moving across a huge current of
surging population. Two women, one with a semi-paralytic husband held on to me
as I tried to ensure they didn’t go out of step and fall behind. In the process
I lost physical contact with my wife who had another elderly couple clutching
at her arm. Looking over the crowd there was no way to locate her or know where
she was heading and in that crowd and chaos it was impossible to even reach for
the mobile. Technology had to eventually yield to Faith and in that
helplessness where one couldn’t chose ones direction or stop and think one
could only remember God with an intensity and depth that was not possible in
normal times.
Don’t
push, don’t shove, be courteous to your fellow Haji’s, allow others to pass are
all prescribed in the rules for Haj and every sermon during your preparation
days emphasized it. You had made a strong mental note to never forget them. In
those 90 minutes that morning, when you are fighting to stay on your feet, you
realize that greatness doesn’t lie in following instructions when things are
normal, in giving when you have plenty. Greatness lies in staying with the
principles during adversity, when your own security is at stake.
It
was a lesson that was to come back to me many times later, to remind me of my
weaknesses and the distance I still have to travel. It was my lesson in
humility.
After
an hour and half of struggle, guided only by instinct and my sense of
direction, I and the three elderly people with me found ourselves on the side
of the narrow street leading to our camp. It was largely deserted since
everyone was moving towards the other end of Mina for the stoning of the devil.
As we stood on the side finally to gather a few moments of rest, it felt as if
standing on the banks of a huge river in rampage, unmindful of what it was
carrying within its course.
Slowly
we trudged back along the silent street to our camp. It felt peaceful after all
the rush till just a few minutes ago. Some people had reached the camp and
everyone had a story to tell. Meenaz, my wife, was not there. The old ladies
with me held my arms and their gratitude was genuine not needing many words.
That day I realized the true pleasure of giving. I suddenly felt everything
will be fine.
Meenaz
returned after half an hour. They had taken a turn in an adjacent lane and had
to take a longer route to reach the camp. Everyone was exhausted and happy to
just lie in their bed and be thankful for being back. It seemed as if we had
been away for a long while though it was for less than 36 hours.
Soon
though we would have to get back on our feet and make the journey for stoning
the devil and then the only remaining mandatory task of Haj – the tawaf-e-ziyarat i.e. circumambulation of
the Kaaba. We had only been through the first two days of the Haj rituals.
Three more days were still ahead of us.
[In the next episode we will look at the remaining rituals of 10 – 12 Zilhijja and how they complete the process of purification and lead towards sustainability.]
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